"Hello?"
"Rachel, it's Kevin from Portland."
"Hello, Kevin from Portland."
"So, when are you moving back up here?"
"I don't know. I'm very... undecided."
"I thought you said March."
"Why are you so anxious to have me up there?"
"Because it was something to look forward to."
"Well, I can't leave yet, I still owe too much money. It's free to live here."
"You can live with me. It'd be nice to have some company at night. When did you become so wishy washy and transient and migratory?"
"I've always been that way. I just had more money before."
"I'll be your sugar daddy. How much do you owe?"
"$xx,xxx."
"Are you kidding me?"
"Student loans included."
"Well, that's not that bad. So, how much should I pay you to be a sufficient Sugar Daddy?"
"I dunno, how about a thousand a month?"
"That's sort of steep."
"Wait, are you serious?"
"Well, why not?"
"You're going to pay me a thousand dollars to come live with you in Portland? What would people think?"
"I don't care."
"Yes you do, remember, you got all mad when I called your name out in your hallway?"
"Yes, because you said, Kevin Pxxxx, stop looking up my skirt!"
"I'm not moving to Portland so you can pay me to be around."
"I can handle a thousand a month."
"Hell, that's cheap."
"How much does a wife cost?"
"I dunno, probably three thousand a month. They require cars and clothes and stuff. I'd just want to pay my bills off. I'd work, too."
"Okay, so when are you moving back?"
"Kevin, I'm not moving back to Portland so you can pay me to be around."
"Hmm."
" ."
"A thousand dollars a month, though."
"Okay. I get it."
"Hmm."
"Well, I don't know. Maybe it's not that bad of an idea."
"When can you come?"
