full of moxie and viscosity

If I was trying to iron my pants with hot air, from my heater vent, and I adjusted it to 90 degrees, do you think it would work? I don’t think it would. The devil would come to me with a real iron and say, look, this is almost 200 degrees. Did you really think 90 would work on your cloth? And then he would make me touch it, but just barely, just enough to realize how hot it really was, and then he would pull my hand away, and then for the rest of my life I would think about that moment, when I felt the heat of the devil in that iron.

What if our finger wrinkles were timers? That way, when I was in the shower, I would be able to tell how much time I had left to get ready for the day just by looking at my fingers.

The street lamps keep flickering on and off. Are they on timers? Or do they turn on and off depending on how much light there is outside? Are there little men inside who wake up angrily with the sun and turn off their lights? Do they have extra sensitive eyes that can only take a certain amount of wattage? Albino red eyes? Or is it that each lamp is reprogrammed every day depending on when the sun is going to rise? What if we made it so each lamp had to be programmed individually? That way we might not have such a bad economy in Portland.

Remember when garage door openers opened other garages besides your own if they were from the same manufacturer? That was crazy.